Hello everyone, everywhere,
This week has been rather an eye-opener. It seems every time I’m not looking, somebody’s stabbing me in the back. I cannot understand this waste of energy and that’s why I have disassociated myself with all of these clowns. That’s the end of that.
(The cat was bugging me. Thank goodness she’s not bugging me anymore. Now she’s bugging Michelle).
I’ve been around these high energy and positive people whom I truly love, and it gives me a reason to get up in the morning. I love being a drummer. I always have, ever since I was eleven. And I love to write and to tell these tales. It’s going to be a very good year for me. And Michelle. And Dean. And the bloody cats.
Rehearsals are going great. We have a live show on Friday, downtown, and that’s always a good workout for us. We see a lot of good people and they love the music.
So upward and onward. See you next week. That’s it.
And now it’s time to close our eyes and our thoughts, if only for a moment…and rest. Last week you read the first part of The Talent Show. And now, the conclusion.
THE TALENT SHOW (Part II)
Now this talent thing was a hurdle Royce G. knew must be accomplished. Okay, here it is. Royce G. Wishformore, eleven years old, stands about five feet four inches tall, his hair sort of brown, sort of blonde. Temperament: happy most of the time; seems to have an interest in the same girls he teased just last year.
Royce had a lot of acquaintances. (That’s like friends you’re not sure you trust yet). Yes, that is correct. Royce G had trust issues. You see, he grew up hard and confused like something was missing. But one day in the schoolyard he met Wendell Baxter.
Wendell was a lot bigger than Royce. Royce didn’t seem to mind. He punched Wendell in the arm and laughed his head off. Wendell just stood there looking down (not too far down) at Royce G, and he smiled. I think they both knew right away that there was history in the making. Now those two clowns became best friends, like forever they said.
So…the talent show. Ah, the talent show. The only reason Royce G wanted to win was well…the winner got a free movie pass for two and (you know it, baby) popcorn. All he had to do was a) think of a talent, and b) win and go to the movies free. It all seemed easy enough to do, but not for Royce G. Wishformore.
When you have grown up with no direction, things get complicated sometimes. Royce G. seemed to trust only himself, on guard all the time, not sure why destiny’s wind blew these crazy feelings he had. Destiny: that’s funny itself, he thought.
A week went by and the talent show was that night! Royce G. decided on comedy. You know, telling jokes. Wendell said, “Do the two-step on stage. They’ll love it.”
That would have been good advice if only Royce knew what a two-step was.
So Royce made his way to the stage. Now before you go on stage there is the pep talk. The pep talk is supposed to inspire you from the words spoken to you by someone who really cares. Unfortunately for Royce, even though his mother and I were there, he decided that Wendell would give the pep talk.
Let me set the scene, kids. You’ve got Wendell, 5 foot 8, tall, fat, but strong as a bull. He was wearing what would forever be known as 1945 army issue glasses. Anyways, folks, it went somewhat like this.
Wendell said, “Royce G., yeah, you’re a star. That’s right, that’s what I said.”
Royce looked at Wendell and said, “You’re mocking me!”
“Oh no, not at all”, Wendell said.
Royce said, “So Wendell, you’re saying I go on that stage where I’ve never set foot before, give them my stuff, and walk away the winner.”
Wendell looked at Royce. “Oh yeah, you’re a winner.”
As Royce was stepping on stage he turned to Wendell and said, “I’m not going to win this thing, am I?”
Wendell turned, rubbed his chin, and said, like a big brother would (even though he was only seven months to the day older), “You have four jokes, and except for me and some of your family, they stink.”
Royce looked at him and said, “Are you saying it’s not going to go well?”
Wendell said, “You’ve got me wrong, bro. You’ll be great!”
Royce said, “Great! Is that what gibberish you’re telling me now?”
Wendell smiled and said, “That’s what I’m saying!”
At that moment, they both started laughing and laughing and then laughing some more.
Royce G went on that stage and laughed through his four jokes. The audience, on the other hand, laughed only when Royce did the two-step. Apparently, this two-step required a two-stepping partner. (Thanks Wendell for that, you moron!)
Anyway, Royce went down in flames. He did not win the movie passes. When Royce G saw it all slipping away, Wendell sat down beside him and said, “I’ve got a paper route. I have money. We’re going to the movies little brother.”
Royce G Wishformore turned to Wendell (they call me Dell) Baxter, and said, quite wide-eyed, “You want to be brothers?”
Wendell hit Royce in the arm and said, “That’s about right.”
And so started a fifty-year talent show. I am Royce G Wishformore’s Grandpa Alec. And I’m telling it to you all just the way he told it to me. Oh yeah, I gave him the book on vaudeville. I’m pretty sure both those two little rascals had a good laugh.
(NEVER EVER GIVE UP)